Random Thoughts

Blog Series | Gender Switch – Alberto

“So you wake up one morning and you realize that your mind is the same but your body is that of the opposite gender. What do you do with your discovery?”

1. Name: AlbertoAlberto

2. Gender: Male

3. Status (Single/Married/etc): Divorced

4. Age: 47

5. Top three things you would do if you woke up to find yourself as the opposite sex for the day?
1. Take care of my appearance – not crotch-less panties etc. – nice underwear, sexy clothes, decent make-up – if you’ve got it, package it, once it is packaged, there is no doubt who decides the when and where…;

2. Pick and choose – there is nothing as attractive as a woman who carries herself with confidence and then adds a bit of naughty. Attracting real men is all about how a woman carries herself – get it right and all she has to do is decide who is going to be next…but note I said real men – the panting poodles do not count – they will hump anybody’s leg…;

3. Sex, sex, sex…a woman can have as much of it as she likes – no physical limitations on reloading and the list of applicants is endless if you know how to carry yourself – and as a bonus if a woman picks the right partners they will spend hours satisfying her – so I would definitely want to find out exactly how multi-orgasmic is multi-orgasmic…

6. Would you allow yourself to do things that otherwise you wouldn’t approve?
No – my lines may be warped but they are not negotiable. So the question should be about what I would not approve of? I tend to be very open-minded on certain things. I still wouldn’t do drugs etc, but when it comes to things like sex, none of us are movie stars and I certainly do not have the moral hang-ups most of the “good” people suffer from. 99% of the time women do not have to do any of the heavy lifting when it comes to sex – you can just go with the flow. I would definitely be trying anything that blows my hair back…  

7. What would be the top three things in your opinion that the opposite gender gets away with? 
1. Taking no initiative when it comes to sex. Word of advice here ladies – the whole “passively enduring” bit is getting old – and you are losing out when you do that… The one thing I have noticed though is that older women for most part know better when it comes to this – older women are more confident and tend to be more prepared to take what they want (and there are a few that have actually realized that taking care of their partners “needs” gives them all the power – and pleasure – in the bedroom). Her participation makes it much more exciting – especially when she does not confine everything to the bedroom alone… Young girls may have the advantage of defying gravity more effectively, but the whole “worshiping at the altar of her body” spiel is boring as crap, so if you are going to do that, you are going to be used as a short term sperm bank…;

2. Taking the moral high ground and playing the gender card when it suits them. If you want to be treated as an equal, pull your weight 24/7 – not only when it suits you (and yes, I know, that cuts both ways…). As a man I am so sick and tired of the whole indignant act women put on when they get “cheated” and “used”. Ladies, men are dogs because you treat them that way. You are the ones who reduce men to the stereotype of being vibrators with wallets. If you want your man to be faithful, try treating him the way he wants to be treated (yes, try finding out what makes him feel like “the man”. You are going to be in for a shock – most men do not even know how to articulate their needs because women never care enough to find out). There are hundreds and thousands of articles and notes on how women want to be treated – but you have decided that men want food, booze and sex – so (sigh) endure it now and then…and you are surprised he is having an affair with the neighbor? (what does he see in that slut??!! Tip: she doesn’t make him feel inferior for one…and it is not the frequency of sex either…).

3. Using sex as a weapon. Speaking as a man with my fair share of experience, here is some free advice to all women – don’t use sex a weapon. The reason you can use it, is because sex is important to a man – and not just because we like getting our rocks off – it is because we are invested in sex and intimacy. You get your power from the fact that denying us sex, is hurting and humiliating us on a very personal level. You will get away with it a few times – and then we will shut you off and go somewhere else – and there is always a “somewhere else” available, even if you think that you man has a collar around the neck and that no other woman will even look at him…;

8. What are the top three benefits of being the gender you are?
1. Being emotionally stable and able to think logically. Sorry ladies, but having managed people for 30 years I can tell you that the PMS excuse doesn’t cover the other 3 weeks of the month. A bunch of women together are bitchy, whine, nasty and definitely not logic driven or emotionally stable. Put a bunch of women in one room and issues are inevitable – you are especially nasty to each other and with a few exceptions you should not be allowed any decision-making authority until you have evolved a lot more;

2.  I can’t be a slut – I can sleep with 50 women and I am a stud – a woman beds 5 men and she is a slut – I love being on the right side of this stereo type…

3. I can’t get pregnant – what is this crap of “we are pregnant” anyway? As a man all I have to do is add seed and stir – it is the woman who does the carrying, goes through labor etc. – I just have to put up with her being a woman…!

One thought on “Blog Series | Gender Switch – Alberto

Share Your Thoughts:

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.