Name: Trisha Cornelius
- List your top five resolutions:
I don’t think that I have resolutions so much as I have goals. I think that it is natural as the year starts winding down we start looking at what is important to us and what we want to achieve in the future.My top five goals can be divided into four categories: professional, creative, health and relationship goals.In the professional sphere the two goals that I have are:
1) Sell a single website and get a testimonial for it.
2) Create a collection of Genesis WordPress code snippets that allows me to assemble beautiful custom themes very fast.
The first goal of selling a website and getting a testimonial for it scares me the most. I have sold websites but I have never asked for a testimonial. I know that I have not asked because I am afraid and I also know that I need to just take a deep breathe, put on my big girl undies and just ask. The worst that can happen is that I get turned down but I have a huge fear of asking, literally typing out this resolution is increasing my anxiety and setting my heart racing.
The second goal is in line with good coding practices of not repeating yourself and will allow me to focus on the more meaningful and important aspects of client websites and will make me a better website designer and developer.
My creative goal is to create some custom text-based art work to decorate the house with. I am a word person and so I have the idea of painting some big pieces with my favourite quotes that inspire me and hanging them on the walls.
My health goal is to improve my eating habits and to exercise more. I have terrible eating habits, especially when I am alone or am in the midst of a depressive episode and will then want to live off of junk food and it is not something that I want my son to emulate and so I am aiming to switch to eating healthy eighty percent of the time. In terms of implementing this I think that the biggest help will be to create some form of structured meal plan because that way it takes away the intellectual effort associated with healthy eating. In terms of getting more active I don’t think that I want to get all structured but I do want to learn more Nia moves and incorporate those movements into my daily life.
Finally, my relationship goal is to be truly present in the relationships that I am in. So spending quality time where my mind is not running off unsupervised while I am with a person but actually showing up with all of me when we are spending time together and making sure that there is time spent together having fun.
- How do you hold yourself accountable for keeping your resolutions?
Historically, I have been a bit of an accountability slacker.
There are a few strategies that have been proven to work when it comes to achieving goal and perhaps the biggest one is making the goal public. This is the first time that I have ever done so, and I am feeling a bit vulnerable about doing so.I think the biggest thing that I am going to do is make my goals public and share my progress.
- How do you define what the most important goals are?
This is a tough question. I think what I did was, somewhat unconsciously to begin with, look at where I would like to be in the future and at people who I admire and work from there. When I was chatting to my therapist (who is also a life coach) she spoke to me about the importance of balancing goals, so not having all career related goals or all health related goals but the division actually happened somewhat serendipitously.
- What are the consequences of not achieving your goals?
The world won’t end and in the big scheme it won’t matter BUT I will be disappointed and I think I would have missed out on living life fully and completely.
- What are some of the obstacles in your way?
I think the biggest obstacle for me is going to be actually getting over my fear of asking and being vulnerable. For example I am confident in my ability to create high quality websites but I have held back from asking for a testimonial by being afraid.It takes courage to show your work, and to put something out there and I think that the biggest thing is for me to just actually look at the fear and then do it anyway.
- Share some light advice on the best methods/ways to keeping your resolutions that work for you.
The best advice that I have ever gotten when it comes to achieving a goal comes from Leo Babauta of Zen Habits (http://zenhabits.net/) and he says never miss two days in a row. This is very much in line with what Gretchen Rubin (http://gretchenrubin.com) says “we tend to overestimate what we can do in a short period, and underestimate what we can do over a long period provided we work slowly and consistently.”And so the approach that I am going to be taking is looking at what are the small meaningful steps that I can take in order to achieve the goals.
The other trick that I have discovered recently is putting my phone on flight mode when I am in work mode, that way I don’t need to rely on willpower to avoid checking incoming messages or social media notifications. I just don’t get them and when I switch my phone back onto its normal mode I get the pings as a reward.