Random Thoughts

Bad Mama: Christmas Wishlist

When I ask you, “What do you want for Christmas? What would be the ultimate best gift for you?”
What popped into your mind?
-Shoes, clothes, phone, a holiday?

Two days ago, someone posted this question on one of the groups I belong to on Facebook –Β What is your dream Christmas gift ladies?
Nothing emotional or “world peace” like. I want you to focus on YOU and if you could have any physical gift, what would it be? A beautiful necklace? A brand name handbag? A hamper full of best selling books? 6-inch heels?

I left my comment in the section of wanting a spa today to just relax a bit. But in the course of others posting their own wishes, I got to rethinking my answer.
I sat and created a few categories based on the ideas of gifts, and then I counted each answer submitted and linked them to the categories. All the answers were submitted a day after the question was posted.
Here’s what I came up with {some ladies had more than one idea for a gift and I included them all under the specific categories}:
~ Me Time – 10
~ For the Kids – 7
~ Expensive Gifts (Kitchen Appliances and assorted) – 16
~ Spa Breakaway – 21
~ Holiday – 17
~ Shopping Spree (Vouchers, Brand names, etc) – 25
~ Jewellery – 12
~ Tech (cellphones, tablets, etc) – 14
~ Books – 8
~ House (moving, a place to stay, remodelling) – 4
~ Debt-Free – 4

After I went through all the answers, I sat back to think about my answer.
More than anything, I’d love some time to myself. I’d love to get away for a day or a weekend from my family. I’d love to be able to sit in silence somewhere and hear just my own thoughts for a change.
But I feel too guilty to want that. I think about my two boys and what I would rather want for them.

I want to give them a full month where I don’t want to worry about how we will survive through the month with food and baby supplies.
I want to give them a warm home where money is the least of our problems.
I want to be able to afford to buy them Christmas gifts this year.
I want to be able to put my kids to bed every night, knowing I don’t need to worry about tomorrow.
I want to be able to get through one day without the guilt and shame of feeling like I’m failing them.

Was the question about what I wanted for Christmas? It seems this is what I want. This is all that I want.
I want my kids to be happy.
I want my kids to be proud of me.
I want my kids to look at me and say “You’re the best mommy.”
I want my kids to look at me and say “I know you’re doing your best, mommy.”
I want my kids to look at me and say “You’re okay and we’re okay, don’t worry so much.”PicsArt_11-16-03.40.56I want much more for my boys than what I want for myself.
And if that’s selfish to feel that way and push my needs and wants to the side for my kids’ happiness, then I’m the most selfish mom in the world.

11 thoughts on “Bad Mama: Christmas Wishlist

  1. I think moms always feel guilty wanting time to themselves. And I think all moms would ultimately have a list that ends pretty much the same as yours. Its amazing how the values of motherhood are so universal.

  2. hmm interesting list πŸ™‚ I agree with the commentator about dad taking the kid but I know that’s not going to happen…

  3. I think you want EXACTLY what you should be wanting. I think every parent should want for their children more than themselves. Just remember not to want for them without taking time out for yourself.

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