Bad Mama

Bad Mama: Stormy Weather and Wet Toes


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This morning I woke up around 06:30 to darkness outside. At first I thought maybe I had set my alarm clock for ‘way too early‘ but no such luck.

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This isn’t the darkness I was referring to… Taken two hours after I woke up.

I dragged myself out of bed; mostly because I struggle to get out of bed normally. I tried to walk as fast as possible to the bathroom to not leave a pee trail behind me, thanks to Gremlin pressing directly on my bladder again.

What followed was my {now} usual routine.

  • Make our bed
  • Wash Monster’s bottle and warm him some milk with honey
  • Unpack his school bag and double check that the contents are right for the day
  • Check my emails
  • Prepare Monster’s clothes for the day
  • Start waking Monster up
  • Prepare Monster’s toiletries
  • Try to wake Monster up again
  • Dress myself into house clothing
  • Wake Monster up again
  • Double check Monster’s school bag
  • Finally wake Monster up and start dressing him

Usually, my routine goes smoothly. Monster is a morning person and wakes up with a smile. He also turns his charm on so he can get away with staying under the warm blankets longer.

This morning was like no other. Monster was full of smiles, cuddles, and song. But as soon as I tried to dress him, he fled to my bedroom. Of course, Mama can’t move around as fast so it took me a while to get all his things {and myself} moved.

We have a ‘thing‘ now where he wants to throw away his own pull-ups away once they come off. So as soon as he pulled them off, he went off to throw them away in the bathroom. Just as he reached me, I felt warm liquid all over my toes. I didn’t need to second guess the fact that he was standing and taking a pee on my feet. At the same time, he was also peeing all over himself. He just stood staring at me with his bottle lip quivering. I would cry too. I don’t think anyone wants to be peed on, even if it’s your own.

By this stage, we were all definitely wide awake and trying to rush the clean up because now we were running behind schedule. When we were finally done, Monster was back to smiling again. He gave me hugs and kisses and off he went to get into the car. I could still see him blowing me kisses as they drove away.

As I sat down in front of my laptop this morning so check my work emails, I started thinking of how much easier it was having a newborn compared to a toddler.

Newborn don’t try to run away when you want to wipe their faces. Newborns don’t try to run away when you’re trying to dress them. Newborns don’t complain when you take just a little too long to follow through with the morning routines. Okay, newborns can’t give you hugs and kisses, but you are in control of how many you can give out yourself. With a toddler, as soon as it feels too much for them, they push you away and frown. Well, my monster does that…

Today’s weather is ‘stay in bed’ weather. Too bad for me. Even though I’m at home, I still get out of bed, sort myself out and then sit at my study table to work. I know myself – if I take my laptop with me to bed, I’ll be snoozing before my Outlook has had a chance to refresh.

Now that’s commitment!!

Today we have another scan. Hopefully today we will have a time for the Cesarean so I can just write it next to the date on my whiteboard, and stare at it in excitement as we count the days off.

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